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The Family Room is a site where our readers can come together to share their insights and experiences. From time to time, we will present a topic to which you may respond. Your responses will then be posted, and later archived for future reference.

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"The Fine Line"
Written by Lisa Rodebaugh

As a mother of a seventeen month old son with a CHD, I find myself wrestling with this and other related questions quite often.  At this stage of my son’s life, the most relevant question has been, how long do I let him cry?  It has always been clear cut with my older son, as long as he is not hurt, he can cry for a few minutes.  This is how we established a consistent bedtime routine at a very young age.  Seemed simple enough to me.

Leave it to the second child to complicate things.  Almost from the moment Andrew was diagnosed with HLHS our world of order and routine crumbled.  My husband Bill and I never let him cry.  We learned very quickly to anticipate his every need, so that he had no reason to get upset.  Simply put Andrew was spoiled.

Now that his heart is stronger and he is older, I try to strike a balance between making him wait for what he wants and not turning twelve shades of purple.  We want him to grow up to be polite, patient, independent and strong.  But the Mommy in me, who has seen all he has gone through, just wants him to grow up.

Sometimes I hold my breath and pray that as I walk this fine line between spoiling him and keeping him healthy, that he and my other children know I am doing this because I love him.

Am I alone in my fears?  Will I get over this?  Should I?

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Family Room Responses
Current topic: The Fine Line
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"A Warm Blanket"
Parents   .   Teens/ACHD'ers  
What are you thankful for?
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For Parents:
What makes you angry about having a child with CHD?
What makes you happy about having a child with CHD?
Parents Page 1   .   Parents Page 2

For ACHD'ers:
What makes you angry about growing up and having a heart condition?
What makes you happy about growing up and having a heart condition?
Adults Page 1   .   Adults Page 2   .   Adults Page 3

"Support Groups"
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"Sibling Issues"
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