On September 10, 1993 our second daughter Marissa Diane was born, our second blessing had arrived perfect in every way possible at 9 lbs. even and 21'' long via c-section. It had been six years since our first daughter so you could imagine how anxious we were to have her in our arms.

As a parent/mother we tend to take for granted, especially myself after having a healthy daughter at home, that all of my baby girl's physical features were present and accounted for and that her delivery went well. This would soon prove wrong as the next 24 hours of our daughter's life would drastically change her world and her family's.

At a day old my daughter was diagnosed with congestive heart failure & failure to thrive related to double outlet right ventricle, and a large interventricular septal defect with open patent ductus arteriosus. Subtle signs had occurred while she was with me, but was unaware as I had felt I was a new mother starting over again as it had been six years. She had a bluish tint to the bridge of her nose, intermittently stopped feeding to breathe and lost weight. These diagnoses were told to my husband and I while the medical staff were trying to stabilize our daughter in the nursery and after our pediatrician called a colleague, a pediatric cardiologist to drive 60 miles to see our baby. It was the worst possible news. We had also been informed that a pediatric cardiac team was on the way from 60 miles away to take our daughter to a specialized heart hospital on Long Island to treat her. That wasn't all, the specialist also stated that due to Marissa's large hole in her heart that she might need OPEN HEART SURGERY. I always remember the feeling, the overcast, loneliness and "why me" and "why her". I couldn't go with our daughter because I was recovering from surgery and my M.D. wouldn't discharge me. So my husband and mother-in-law followed our baby girl to St. Francis hospital, where upon admission she was baptized and given her last rites after my husband called me for my consent for the baptism/prayer, and I had listened on the phone 60 miles away not knowing if I would ever hold her again.

Marissa was a fighter and our prayers were answered. On the third day, my M.D. granted my discharge and I was able to join my daughter whom had stabilized but had lost 2 lbs and was slowly feeding in pediatric CCU for the next nine days, not missing one minute of our precious time together. On the Marissa's 12th day we were discharged home. Marissa was not out of the woods like we had hoped she would be. Marissa required daily regimens of heart medications to prevent congestive heart failure, protein supplements mixed in her special formula and biweekly check-ups with the pediatrician and the pediatric cardiologist. Marissa never cried, always cooed and smiled, never missing anything going on around her. Every day was a celebration in our house that our family was together.

In January 1994, Marissa was scheduled for a cardiac catheterization to follow up on the condition of her heart. The test confirmed that Marissa would need corrective surgery to repair the large hole in her heart when she turned a year old and that she would live as normal a life as a young child would. She had done remarkably well with the procedure, no complications.

Complications started to occur. Colds, infections and pneumonia took its toll on her. Her body was burning more calories to fight illness than were consumed with weight loss occurring. Every time we had won one battle, we were fighting another, a smile always on Marissa's face. I would always hold, sing and comfort her. I would never let her cry.

On March 15th, 1994 would be our day of testament. My husband and I had met with the cardiac surgeon 2 weeks prior at the recommendation of the specialist. Marissa was having to many setbacks, she was only 15 lbs at 6 months of age and they were afraid she wasn't going to make her first birthday. March 15th was the day that would forever change our lives, Marissa's Open Heart Surgery.

At twelve noon, my husband and I would bring our daughter to the surgical room to meet the anesthesiologist, to watch him carry our daughter away, with Marissa peering over his shoulder, smiling at her parents as he carried her to the operating room.

I along with my husband and our families waited six and a half long hours of which we were told would only be a three hour procedure. The surgeon had called us three hours into the surgery stating complications and that we may want to pray. Thankfully Marissa had survived the surgery; but she was extremely critical, and the next 24-48 hours were very crucial to  her survival. Our beloved angel Marissa Diane went into cardiac arrest with her parents by her side, four hours after her long surgery. We watched as the same people we've come to know and greatly appreciate for participating in our daughter's recovery, were trying to bring her back to her family. Marissa had fought her last courageous battle. We now know God had other intentions for our precious baby girl. We were never prepared nor counseled for her death. We are all devastated by our loss. Marissa is our living angel within our hearts and left us her destiny to carry out: To live one day at a time, to cherish all that surrounds you and to live life to its fullest as life is to short. We thank God every day for the six months of sunshine he had shared with us. Life is precious.